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Rich & Famous

Getting Back Together with an Ex – Is It a Good Idea?

November 25, 2021

Breakups can be rough – we all know that. Once you go through it, you start realizing why there are so many songs about heartbreak. And every single one makes sense, for some reason. Then comes the part about coping with the new change. Everyone deals with breakups differently. How do you handle it? By going for a rebound or cocooning yourself up for some time?

Pexels | Every once in a while, feelings about getting back with an ex can resurface – and it’s completely normal

Here’s What’s Happening in Hollywood

Word on the street is that Bennifer (Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez for those not caught up) recently rekindled their relationship on a trip to Montana. Fans will remember the Bennifer split as one of the most shocking celebrity breakups – no one saw it coming. Now, over 15 years later, the spark of familiarity and comfort has seemingly sparked between the two once again. And this is a more usual occurrence than you’d think. According to a Journal of Social and Public Relationships study, about 50% of couples get back together with an ex even after breaking up.

The Allure of Getting Back Together

The idea of getting back together mostly springs up when circumstances caused you to split up rather than problems in the relationship. Sometimes scenarios like long-distance, different priorities or values, and even timing can make breaking up inevitable. As mentioned before, the appeal of a familiar feeling, touch, sound, and smell can often be too strong to resist.

Pexels | Experiencing some time and distance away for personal growth also makes a relationship better the second time around

Does Getting Back with an Ex Work?

You should note that rekindling an old spark isn’t always the best idea. Maybe your ex isn’t that great of a partner, or the relationship isn’t healthy, or either of you might have some “stuff” to deal with. You should also note that if you need your ex back to “complete you”, you need to get as much distance from any relationship as possible. The idea that a significant other can “complete you” is fundamentally flawed. Moreover, if your ex is displaying the same behavior that caused you to break up with them, call it quits immediately. There’s no point going down the same road twice, just like there’s no point in returning to an abusive or toxic ex.

Pexels | If you think of your time together as “difficult and hellish”, it’s best not to go back

Other than that, if you were really good together and the breakup was circumstantial, then there’s no reason not to give it another go. Perhaps they’ve matured enough or gained a different perspective on life, you never know. At the end of the day, stick with your gut feeling. It knows what’s good for you and what’s not.

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